Five Damning Facts About Calvinism
I. It’s daily re-salvation by preaching the gospel to yourself every day. II. Its progressive justification defines “Christians” as under law—the biblical definition of a lost person. III. Forgiven…
Paul's Passing Thoughts
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Paul's Passing Thoughts 
Did you hear about the elderly Calvinist lady who fell down a flight of stairs? She said, “Thank goodness that’s over with.” (Yes, it’s an old joke.)
Definition of confusion? A Calvinist suicide hotline. (Another old one.)
I have heard these silly jokes years ago, and I honestly don’t enjoy poking fun at someone who has no idea of what awaits him or her at the other end of THAT follow-up heartbeat that’s not going to come.
Calvinism is sad, cruel, from Satan, inspired by demons too, insulting, fake, a lie, misleading, blasphemous, man worship, idolatry, selfish, illogical, elitist, empty, hopeless, contradictory, sick, silly, perverted, sexually obsessed, mean, deadly, dark, witchy, mystical, worldly, unchristian, anti-Biblical, dishonest, and so it goes on.
Half of the Calvinist women in North America have probably already bought tickets to go and watch “Fifty Shades of Darker,” which premieres over the weekend. Why? Because a prominent Calvinist once said there’s nothing wrong for a Christian to watch these kinds of movies. And in that movement, man is god, and so you have it. There, I have just choked on my chin. Now, half of these Calvinist women are by nature bloggers, and I bet you that by Monday morning after they have probably seen this pornographic, mentally ill, abnormal and sexually perverted rubbish movie twice, they are going to “warn” all their followers to stay away from this “filth.” Such is the logic in Calvinist circles…absent. Another reason for actually watching it, but one they won’t admit to, is that they hade no choice. And yet another is that it’s good for personal sexy time…if you’re a worldly person with worldly passions and worldly perversions…oh, hold on…many of them are!! Eureka moment!
Okay, last one (silly old me). What do you call a Presbyterian who has just gulped down a Pepsi? A Hyper-Calvinist.
We should be praying for Calvinists; there are such lovely people among them, people who truly believe they are on the right way, and some will tell you that they believe in Jesus (yes, albeit the “another Jesus”), but the desire is there. We should be praying for them, that the abnormal and perverted blindfolds fall from their eyes and that they may behold the glory of the real Jesus Christ. He, Jesus, is 50 shades of true salvation.
Paul, all in all, Calvinism is damning. There is no way around or over it. It is damning. The end. I hope it dies tonight.
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