Paul's Passing Thoughts

Certainly, I will make millions with my discovery of a niche market among Christians. Whether on Facebook, in Christian bookstores, or the back bumper of a minivan, we see a constant parade of colorful placards that remind us of how pathetic we are as Christians. Ironically, pastors promote these placards to keep the sheep manageable, but then go to their Monday golf outings and whine about “10% of the parishioners doing 90% of the work.” Hey, there is a price to pay for being in control.

Today’s Christians remind me of my former stint as an installation manager for one of the largest security companies in the world. As a Christian manager, I was at first surprised by so much humbleness among the unregenerate. The technicians routinely touted themselves as the least among their peers, and constantly sang the praises of capable technicians other than themselves. I soon realized that this was a ploy to get out of doing the more difficult and challenging jobs. If you sent them on a difficult job, they would make you pay by going there and playing dumb. This would turn the whole day upside down for someone in my position. I eventually got around the problem by sending two or three technicians to do the job of one.

And let there be no doubt about it, this kind of laziness is at the core of much Christian humbleness in our day. Pastors are the worst offenders, claiming to be “unqualified” in helping people with the more difficult life problems. The way the “mentally ill” have been relegated to the closets of the church is the “scandalous gospel” indeed. It is having a form of godliness while denying the power of it.

These little jpeg posters that appear on Facebook are all the rage in our day and only represent totally depraved Christians. So, I am starting the Little Blue Christian That Could Productions. This, of course, is a tribute to the children’s story, “The Little Blue Engine That Could.” My niche market is the born again crowd. Here is what Wikipedia states about “The Little Blue Engine That Could”:

The Little Engine that Could is an illustrated children’s book that was first published in the United States of America in 1930 by Platt & Munk. The story is used to teach children the value of optimism and hard work. Based on a 2007 online poll, the National Education Association named the book one of its “Teachers’ Top 100 Books for Children.”

The story’s signature phrases such as “I think I can” first occurred in print in a 1902 article in a Swedish journal. An early published version of the story, “Story of the Engine that Thought It Could”, appeared in the New York Tribune, 8 April 1906, as part of a sermon by the Rev. Charles S. Wing.

Shazaam! This idea has Christian roots! This is huge! Therefore, I proudly unveil the very first pithy truisms of the Little Blue Christian That Could Productions: