Paul's Passing Thoughts

I have always wanted to write a poem or the kissing cousin to a poem—the ode. This essay in ode form will have to suffice for the rough draft; perhaps I will find time later to put it in poem or lyric form, or someone else will be inspired by the essay and save me from the effort. For the sake of a life that speaks from the grave, it would indeed be a worthy effort.

The Strophe

Really, I was just minding my own business when I married this man’s wife who survived him, a man struck down by the world’s devices—Wayne St. Denis. He had a large library of theological books which I inherited. In many of the books he wrote his thoughts where printed words did not occupy, and I have read them. Not all of them mind you, but enough to see the sentiment of the heart.

What I knew of Wayne’s life from others and the heart I saw in his books has laid siege to my thoughts for several months now. An eerie contradiction not in the forefront, but yet following my heart like a stray dog that refuses to go away until it is fed.

In all, mutual ground between me and one in the grave; we both hate hopelessness. Wayne lost his battle with the beast, but his life story only adds to my resolve to fight this monster. The monster’s intimidation and strong message only feeds my resolve and hatred of it. Because of God, where there is life—there is hope—I stake my life on this belief.

The Antistrophe

There is no need to go into all of the gory details of Wayne’s behavior, but yet, this is the testimony that has followed him to the grave; it is his legacy. A like story was sent to me by a reader this week that was written by an agnostic. The author wrote of another professing Christian’s life and asked the following question which is now a companion to the first dog: “Why is God so bad at making people good?”

From 1950 to 1970, the first gospel wave would answer that question as follows: “God doesn’t make us good until we go home to be with him. Until then, we are ‘sinners’ saved by grace.” From 1970 to present (the second gospel wave), the mantras are, “It’s not about our doing, it’s about HIS doing and dying.” “It’s not about us, it’s about making us small and the cross big.” “It’s about making much of Jesus.” “If we get better, that eclipses the Son.”

Does that answer the agnostic’s question? “God is not trying to make us good. If He wanted us to be good, He could make us good.” And perhaps Michael Horton would answer the question this way: “We preach the gospel; we don’t try to be the gospel.”

I have read Wayne’s notes. He would have strongly objected to such a notion. So what’s with the life? The first gospel wave would say, “Well, at least he was saved.” The second gospel wave would say: “His problem was that he tried. He made an effort to keep the law. Therefore, he was ‘making his sanctification the ground of his justification.’ He was a legalist which is why his life was powerless. That’s why he never experienced, ‘real and lasting change.’ He would try, and fail—try, and fail—try, and fail over and over again. He partook in ‘Christless activism’ which is why his life didn’t show forth the fruits of Christ’s active obedience. He wasn’t saved, he was a Pharisee. He lived a hopeless life, and died without hope.”

The first and second gospel wave would debate Wayne’s probable eternal state, the latter accusing the former of easy believeism, and the former accusing the latter of legalism (not realizing that they believe Jesus obeys for us). In both cases however, Salvation is enough. The gospel is the final word.

Wayne would have never bought that, he was searching in a world that (to a large degree) didn’t believe what he believed—that God had the answers and solutions for life’s deepest problems—here and now. He was a man who sought to give answers to others in various ways, but he was seemingly searching by himself, perhaps passing others who were searching like two ships in the night.

The Epode

Funny, not many give hope that Wayne was saved though his life looked a lot like another man who lost hope when he couldn’t seem to find the answers: King Solomon. And like the description of the man written of by the agnostic, Wayne had a storied gospel life of being miraculously transformed from a life of decadence, and henceforth paraded around before others as a celebration of the gospel that is enough. And when they fell, as usual, the propagators of everything gospel didn’t have the answers…. because the gospel is enough.

Yes, Wayne should of learned to live by the gospel that saved him. Who knew? Supposedly, Wayne should have lived by the gospel honeymoon that apparently requires no investment in relationship following. That would eclipse our Spouse.

I contend that Wayne tried to do the right thing the wrong way. And as he failed, he lost hope, and perhaps the demons kicked out of the house during the honeymoon were tamer than the ones who returned. Nevertheless, those who mocked his efforts by predicting his short-term repentance were of no more help than the demons. At any rate, King David is testimony to how we can go from men after God’s own heart to falling into unspeakable sin. Though the enslaving power of sin is broken in the believer, it is still present and powerful. That powerful? Yes, I think so.

The gospel is a settled issue for the dead, but the lives of the dead still speak from the grave on other issues with the help of God’s counsel contained in the Bible. In Wayne’s efforts to find life more abundant after gospel life, he colored his life with more than his legacy. That is  sanctification truth that Philippians 4:8 points us to. That verse isn’t about the gospel, it is about truthful, sanctified thinking about others. Wayne’s legacy isn’t the truth, what his life really was as whole is the truth. Armed with the truthful remembrance of Wayne’s entire life, and biblical wisdom concerning how men who love God can fall deep and hard, forgiveness is found for Wayne by some that he harmed long after his departure.

That is the power of sanctification wisdom beyond the gospel. There is no healing apart from truth. That is the power of the word that equips us for every good work. That is the power of the word that we live by. I am therefore inspired to dedicate my life to the idea that salvation is not enough, we need resurrection also, and in showing forth the power that resurrected Christ from the grave, men want what we have. We have been given that power as a gift, but with any gift, ownership, learning, and responsibility is implicit.  Wayne failed in his search to best appropriate God’s wisdom for his life, but that doesn’t mean we should fail also. His life is a testimony to why we shouldn’t. His life still speaks from the grave….

The gospel is not enough.

paul