Paul's Passing Thoughts

“Biblical” Counseling and the Marriage Cold Wars

Posted in Uncategorized by Paul M. Dohse Sr. on January 8, 2018

ppt-jpeg4The biblical counseling movement has come a long way since its beginning in 1970. What does it presently look like? It is totally geared for defining every characteristic of a “Christian” as one in total submission to the institutional church. EVERY aspect of a “true” Christian is set against their willingness to totally eradicate self in exchange for a plenary collectivist worldview regarding church.

“Faith” is defined in regard to one’s willingness to trust the church elders. “Love” is defined by one’s willingness to make church first priority in everything. “Discernment” is simply believing, or buying into EVERYTHING the church teaches. A man who “leads his home” is a man who orders his home after the dictates of the church leaders according to every detail.

This all began to come full circle about 10 years ago with how so-called “church discipline” was being practiced, and still is. Members are not brought under discipline for sin, but for questioning church authority. While other members live in open sin, upright individuals who commit the cardinal sin of thinking for themselves are dealt with swiftly and with the same amount of mercy indicative of the Salem witch trials. This ministry has received so much correspondence and documentation on this that it is now barley more than white noise in the background.

The same can be said for those presently embroiled in the biblical counseling marriage cold wars. Two people presently married legally, perhaps living in the same house, but in an unresolved standoff. The only question left is who is going to file for divorce and end the standoff. In-between is the church. One spouse is dedicated to the church; the other not.

Please note: some of these standoffs, or cold wars, drag on for years; yes, years. Why? Because one spouse doesn’t get it: this will ONLY be resolved in one of two ways; divorce, or the “errant” spouse agreeing to capitulate to church authority. The “errant” spouse may want to save the marriage and is trying to work out a compromise. NOT. It’s just not going to happen.

Newsflash to the errant spouse: you are already divorced because the church covenant has replaced your marriage covenant. Obviously, something other than death has separated you; church.

Furthermore, the “godly” spouse (viz, totally sold out to the church) may be practicing evil of every sort. The church leaders will, and do deem such totally irrelevant until the truly evil spouse submits to church authority. At that point, the “repentant” spouse has a right to be heard, but not a nanosecond before. To address the submissive spouse’s evil in any way, shape, or form, is to give aide and comfort to the rebellious spouse (viz, one who thinks independent thoughts and hasn’t completely given personal conscience to church authority).

Let me be clear: these cold wars are pandemic in the church. The church is now coming full circle to its original church-state persona.


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  1. John said, on January 8, 2018 at 11:05 AM

    Paul, the diabolical ACBC (“biblical counseling” guano droppings) nonsense is in my view the reconnaissance unit of the institutionalized Protestant “church” (emphasis being on Calvinist, Reformed, Presbyterian, and whatever “church” wants to bite the hook).

    This petulant movement (who is “forever reforming”; what a bite-my-own-bum statement) hits where the normal church can’t: right inside your home. Abused women are made to shut up and “forgive” because “we’re all sinners saved by grace” rubbish. Women and young girls are sexually abused and are being told to submit to the husband/father no matter what, be it in abnormal, unnatural sexual activities (yeah, I’d even call it “animalistic”). The majority of offenders in these “Christian” households belong in prison and those party to the criminal offenses, well, are criminals too, convicted or not.

    “Church discipline” in itself is a misnomer; a dead give away of this evil, evil Calvinist movement. (See, John Immel, today I’m calling them evil, and not a cult, although I am oh-so-tempted). Who/what is church discipline? Who decided on it? Jesus? God? The Holy Spirit? No, no, and no.

    Keep your eyes on this despicable thing called ACBC: it’s the enemy inside your home. No born-again Christian should have anything to do with this thing. It has nothing to do with the Biblical God; it’s a man-made authoritarian little scheme to get control of your home. It’s a gossip party; a pseudo-psychological room of horrors. It is evil.

    Sigh, how many times have you heard that when your vehicle is broken, take it to a motor mechanic; if your teeth need some work, go see a dentist; if there are spiritual problems in the house, “Well, we have certified (hilarious term) counselors, and by-golly-gee, there are a couple right here in our wonderful coffee-drinking, hipster church. And we promise that everything that goes in there is confidential.” Rubbish, rubbish, rubbish.

    Light has nothing to do with darkness. Let Satan sit and play with himself; who cares? We are born-again children of our Father; Jesus saved us once (no weekly recharge is needed, etc.), and we are indwelled by the Holy Spirit. We help one another and if someone does see or hear voices, we don’t simply “pray it away” because it won’t go away. We refer to proper medical professionals. Why? Because God has given us intelligence and common sense.

    A husband and wife do not need a “counselor” in their homes. You might just as well invite a prostitute or a stripper to come and give you two “marriage” counseling.

    Thanks for this piece, Paul. Needed, as always.


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